Twenty Twenty one ! The year when I ended up hitting 30 and yet there was nothing worth hitting the masculine gender around. What really was special was that I was pampered with gifts , cards and cakes. A family dinner and surprise from my niece. But I was and am still single....
What was it for me ? Why didnt it happen ? May be, well there is no space for may be , it is pretty obvious the only reason is COVID.
And ofcourse pretty much the hope of our expectations getting fulfilled never gets fulfilled.
The history of women leaving the house when getting married is a tradition, challenging the age old tradition was ofcourse seen quite negatively by most of the people around and still seen ;). It definitely pulled to be another reason for not hitting one for me.
Yet , isn't it fair that if I wanted to take care of my dad and ask if the guy can move down for me to the place where I live ?
Isn't it fair to make an effort to understand why I wish ?
Isn't it fair to expect an educated guy with a minimal financial stability ?
Isn't it fair that I am allowed to work even after tying the knots ?
Well , I know a friend abroad who moved to the city where his girlfriend lives because she had a better opportunity there financially and mentally.... That is culturally accepted in the society. Even today he jokes that he would marry some one who would earn and he just had to do the house hold chores. May be this is why one always says the other side of the grass is always green...
I love the Indian culture and traditions , the festivals . Yet , I complain the made up societal culture and societal tantrums that is unfair to the dreams and expectations of the women ... With numbers on the age , there is a beautified set of guidelines making our lives quite simple ( sarcasm intended).
For all the fulfilment of the importance of a companion in the life of a woman, one has to go through in the societal world , the matrimonial shackles , which can come with compromises, adjustments, baggages of emotions and what not on one end. On flipping the other end , it does bring joy , love , pamper and happiness !!!
Above all if you dare to open those dating apps and confess you are virgin , the guys can get heart attacks and be surprised as how can you be still virgin. In fact, I know a friend where she was getting treated for her health issues and was expressing his shock multiple times to her due to her virginity.
For the Indian women out there , my peers , my seniors who are the bachelorette , bold and beautiful , I got to know the share of their pain. They had expectations which were minimal in terms of education qualification and financial stability for they had toiled hard , some were ready to leave and settle abroad. But everyone paid the price to have sorrows and got nothing but completely shattered. The results were the relationship in an arrange setup broke off in a year, some engagements were called off , some men just ignored all the emotional effort and time that was put up, some didn't want to work them and get them locked under the walls of kitchen and the endless list that goes on. To all who crossed this marathon of emotions and families getting married , few months down the lane they were filing papers for divorce .
Finding a partner is tough, a challenge. People mention go with the flow ! If it is meant to happen it has to happen.
trust me sometimes you feel that you have to make it happen.
Sometimes you feel people mentioning were right.
I really don't have an answer what is right or wrong !
All I know is
I want to work this out .
I want to dream
I am not bound to be a kitchen slave all time.
I have not slogged my ass to shatter my dreams for a need of companion ,
I have made sacrifices , managed my time , lit candles to read in the dark , pursued my dreams , skipped my desires and never got the influence of worldly temporary pleasures...
All I wanted was to be a virtuous girl , a compassionate women.
Now don't ask me to settle down just seeing the number of my age has hit 30 or beyond that.
Give me the time , give me the peace, give my supportive parents some space and not hunt them down telling I am growing old and get me married.
For every daughter is a princess to her father !
For every father all he looks for is her happiness !
I want to be happy , I know days can be gleamy and I am looking for someone who sticks through that and is just not attached to physical intimacy !
I know there will be days when I am at fault and I am looking for that same someone who can mend me with my flaws and look going forward.
I know I have reached heights and I really want the same someone who has also been in that path atleast made an attempt for he would understand what that means which involves sacrifices on making the life a red carpet with path of redroses.
I know I am a person who will shower care love and affection. I know I am a person who will accept the family of my someone with the same affection and increment the count of my care givers.
Well, why I wrote this to be honest I don't know. May be I wrote this just to let you know your struggle is not alone.
May be I wrote this facing another a****** who doesn't respect my emotional investment .
May be I wrote this to get some strength.
May be I wrote this to vent out.
May be I wrote this hearing a story that makes me empathize.
May be I wrote this, just to let you know that we will sail through this as I believe "Hope is the most beautiful thing in the world ".
No matter what you are going through , I hope this post gives you all the strength you need to sail through. And never give up , I don't know if we should seek love or love would seek us.
In any case, let your hearts be open and close it for that someone when you are sure until then life is beautiful and family / friends are unconditional source of strength.
Forward it if you think there is another girl friend of yours who needs to read this ☺️ and can be a source of shoulder in those gleamy days
✍️
❤️❤️❤️
ReplyDelete